Five things to remember when you are pregnant after a loss.

The 5 Things I Hope You Remember During Your Pregnancy after Loss Journey

The pregnancy after loss journey is…complicated. It is every emotion that you have ever felt and they are all struggling to exist together.  You may feel like you are faced with an ever-growing list of things to do and remember. I know how that feels.  So, when it all feels too daunting and you doubt…

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Losing a baby gets easier--and it never stops being hard.

Losing A Baby Gets Easier–And It Never Stops Being Hard

The experience of having your baby die--it is hard stuff. Those first minutes and days and weeks feel impossible.  You find yourself living minute to minute.  You are just trying to get one moment further in this new life you didn't ask for.  The most basic tasks of living feel arduous.  Breathing, eating, bathing, sitting…

Men don't grieve differently because they are men, they grieve differently because no one grieves the same.

Let’s Stop Telling Men How They Grieve–Just Let Them Grieve

So often when we talk about pregnancy and infant loss, there is a light being shone on the bereaved mother.  She is vulnerable and strong all at once.  She inspires our deepest sympathies and encourages us to listen to her story. But, what about the fathers? Despite our best intentions, women have become the face…

Sharing your story of loss and grief is a courageous act.

To Those Who Know The Heartbreak Of Pregnancy & Infant Loss–Your Story Is A Blessing

These words are for those who have known the heartache of pregnancy and infant loss-the mothers and fathers, grandparents, and loved ones.  I am writing for those of you who so lovingly share your stories of loss and the photos of your babies gone too soon. I need you to know something. Your story is…

Therapy can be an important tool in healing after loss.

Using Therapy To Heal After Pregnancy And Infant Loss

There’s an assumption that people go to therapy to fix what’s broken.  I believe this is a reason why people regard therapy with such hesitation.  It’s painful to face your fragmented life and it can be even more painful to pick up the pieces. If you’re a bereaved parent, you might not see the point…

Having a baby after a loss will not fix the pain, but it can still bring you hope.

I Thought My Living Baby Would Fix The Pain Of Child Loss

When Dorothy died, I plummeted.  I found myself in the lowest place I had ever been to.  It was far below any place I had visited before.  You might know the level I speak of; a low so far down that when you look up, you see black. There is nothing there for you.  And…

When your baby dies and you are left watching the life of a baby who lived.

When Your Baby Dies And You Are Left Watching Another Live The Life You Lost

My daughter, Frances, has a favorite game that we play.  It’s called ‘baby in the mirror’ and it consists of her father or I holding her up so she can watch ‘the baby in the mirror.’ She is fascinated by her reflection and she seems both elated and unsure of what her mirror baby might…