Proud Mama

I am a proud Mama because I carried life in me for 30 weeks.  My womb is the only home my daughter ever knew and I did my best to take care of her while she resided there.  I know that while she was there she only knew love and comfort.

I am a proud Mama because I named my daughter, Dorothy. I wanted her name to be classic.  I chose a name for her that evokes strength and good character because that’s how I imagined her to be.

I am a proud Mama because I labored with my daughter when my body was shutting down.  Even though my body was threatening to quit on me, I needed to push and bring her into this world.  Above all else, I knew I needed her in my arms.

I am a proud Mama because I make sure to say my baby’s name every day, even if it’s just to myself.  I want her name to be whispered, spoken, shouted, and sang.  When her name is said, my heart feels full.

I am a proud Mama because when others have made assumptions about who my daughter was or how I feel about her, I have told our truth.  I will not let our story be assumed by others.  Anyone who truly knows ME will know our journey.

I am a proud Mama because I have a child who inspires kindness and open hearts.  My daughter lives on in the good deeds done in her name and the stories shared in her honor.  Her legacy will be one of love and compassion.

I am a proud Mama because I have found a way to be a mother to my daughter, even in her absence.  Every time I write, create, or advocate I am being a mother to Dorothy.  My time and efforts that would have been devoted to her are being devoted so that I may help others.

I am a proud Mama because I am not afraid.  While others may shy away from our family because we make them sad, I will not let them change who we are.  Our family knows heartache and we embrace it.  That’s why our hearts are so strong.

I am a proud Mama because I have found a community of other proud parents.  They encourage me to share.  They support me when I am vulnerable.  They love me when I need it most.

I am a proud Mama because I know true love.  I heard it in the lub-dub of her heartbeat, I felt it in the flutters of her kicks, and I saw it in the delicate beauty of her face.  When she ceased to be, my love for her grew even stronger.

I am a proud Mama because I belong to her and she belongs to me and that is forever.

This piece was originally published on Courageous Mothers Community

Photo by Catherine McMahon on Unsplash , Typography by Rachel Whalen