How do we do it?
Those of us who have experienced pregnancy and infant loss, how do we do it when it all seems impossible?
When we are told the worst news of our life–how do we comprehend it?
How do we stare at silent screens?
How do we hear heartbreaking news?
How do we carry on knowing that the end has already come?
When our baby is gone and we are forced to keep living–how do we stumble through the hurt?
How do we make those phone calls to share our heartbreak?
How do we decide that this moment holding our babies will be the last?
How do we make ourselves care about the mundane when we have lost what is extraordinary?
When we are forced to love our children from a distance–how do we keep them close?
How do we go home to empty houses with empty arms?
How do we sign the paperwork to determine the fate of our child’s remains?
How do we face those first days without them?
How do we remember a life when there are never enough memories?
When the world seems like it only has enough space for the living–how do we hold space for the ones who have left?
How do we answer the questions and look past the eyes that pity us?
How do we get out of bed in the morning and how do we survive the loneliness at night?
How do we decide that life is still worth living when we must do it without the ones who brought our lives new meaning?
How do we watch the people we love deal with incredible loss when we have also suffered?
I don’t really know how we do it all.
What do I know?
I know how we love our babies.
That’s the easy part.