We Can Imagine What It’s Like When A Baby Dies–We Just Don’t Want To

"I can't imagine what you're going through." If your baby has died, you have heard this phrase. I'll guess you've heard it more than once. Maybe it was written in a sympathy card that you could barely bring yourself to open in those first days of grief. It's what so many choose to say when…

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Finding The Words–5 Things To Say After A Baby Dies

When a baby dies it is devastating. It is an unexpected and heartbreaking tragedy. It is very possible that people might not know what to say and that makes sense. They may wonder how could words ever be enough to take away the pain? What could one possibly say to remove the burden of losing…

Honor Your Grief AND The Environment–5 Sustainable Ways To Memorialize Your Loved One

There is no one way to grieve. This is fact. Grief does not come with a rule book. We are not meant to judge the grief experience of another. However, there is one grief practice that I would like reconsidered--the balloon release. Many people choose to release balloons to memorialize their deceased loved ones. Often…

Dear Abby: Your Advice About Grief Is Not Helpful And It Hurts

Oh, Abby. I saw your column today--the one where you gave advice to Crystal in Nevada. She wrote to you asking how to cope with her aunt who had a stillbirth 20 years ago. Crystal wanted to know how to talk to this aunt who lives such a “morbid lifestyle.” To encourage her to move…

7 Ways To Include The Grieving Father On Father’s Day

Father's Day is approaching. If you are a grieving father, or you know a grieving father, you are probably aware of the weight that this day holds. The father who is grieving already struggled to be acknowledged, but there's something about Father's Day that makes it more difficult. While their intentions are good, many people…

My Advice To The Person Who Is Pregnant–Take Your Picture

I'm not one to issue advice, especially when no one's asking. I am especially hesitant to offer advice to a person when they are a pregnant, but I do have something I need to say. If you are pregnant, I want you to take the picture. No matter how far into your pregnancy you may…

I Don’t Need Help Finding The Bright Side Of Baby Loss–There Isn’t One

When my daughter died, everyone wanted to know what could they do. How could they help me feel better? What would make this easier? Their questions confused me. During the darkest days of my life, it seemed impossible to feel better. I could think of nothing that would cheer me up. It took some time…