Siblings Grieve Too And We Owe Them Honest Conversations About Their Siblings Who Died

"Hey bubs, guess who's coming over this weekend." It was a simple question for my toddler, asked in an effort to make conversation and prolong our 110th listening of the Little Mermaid soundtrack. "Oh, I know," she responded, her eyes smiling. "Who's coming over?" I repeated. "It's my sister, Dorothy. She will come play." Gripping…

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No parent should have to choose between grieving the child who died and parenting the child who lived.

Please Don’t Make Me Choose Between My Child Who Died And My Child Who Lives

I always imagined myself the mother of multiple children. It seemed like a simple enough task. If I wanted two or more children in my family, then all I needed to do was get pregnant, have a baby and repeat the process as desired. As it turns out, getting pregnant has very little to do…

Living A Life That’s Incomplete–Why It’s So Hard When Your Child Dies And Why Life Is Still Worth Living

Child loss is hard. We know this. It’s a universal understanding that losing a child is one of the most difficult experiences a person will endure, but still, a question arises. Why is this so hard? I’ve heard this question about grief and child loss asked again and again. I’ve been asked by those who have lost…

My Daughters Have Never Met, But That Doesn’t Mean They Don’t Know Each Other

She found the photo on my nightstand. I flinched when she grabbed it, imagining the inevitable destruction that toddlers leave in their wake. Instead, I found myself surprised at the gentle and knowing way she cradled it in her hands. A very atypical move for our rough-and-tumble girl. "Baby." she stated in her breathy squeal.…

The Mental Load Of The Grieving Mother

I do not consider myself to be busier than any other mother I know. I'm sure we all have the same sinks piled high with dishes, the same stack of bills, and the same pick-up/drop-off schedules to coordinate. There are the same doctor's appointments to schedule, the same load of laundry that's been washed three…

We’re Done Having Children And My Family Is Incomplete

As a mom who has experienced loss, I have always dreaded the question, “How many children do you have?” For so long, I struggled with finding an answer that was simple and truthful. Now, after over two years of fumbling my words, I feel somewhat okay with sharing that I have two daughters knowing that…

To My Fellow Loss Mamas–I Love You No Matter What

Dear Courageous Mama, I want you to know that I love you. No matter when or how your baby died, you deserve nothing but love and support. And that, beautiful mama, is what I have for you. I love you in your moments of celebration.  I love you in your moments of grief. I love…