This Thanksgiving, Let’s Share What We’re Thankful For And Who We Are Missing

The Thanksgiving table can be such a source of joy. There's great food to share and good company to share it with. When it comes to the conversation, that same table can also be a source of anxiety. Once we're all done partaking in the feast, what do we talk about? There are so many…

This Halloween, When The Doorbells Are Silent–Please Think Of The Children Not Here To Ring Them

It's Halloween night and the doorbell rings. You grab the bowl of candy and head to greet your trick-or-treaters. As the door swings open, you hear the rustle of plastic bags and the thudding of plastic pails awaiting their prize. "Trick or treat!" their voices chime and you smile as you pass out candy to…

The Holidays Hurt Because This Is Not The Last Holiday Without Them

This will be my third Christmas since my daughter was stillborn and it hurts that she's not here. For three years I have known the heartache of balancing grief and joy during the holiday season. I have learned a lot about how to cope during the holidays, so it seems like it shouldn't hurt so…

We Hang Four Stockings In A House Where Three People Live

Someday, during a future Christmastime, I imagine that my daughter will ask me a question. Her tone will be inquisitive and her eyes curious, but it will not be a question deep with meaning. Instead, her question will be imbued with the simple curiosity of a child who notices when the number of stockings doesn't…

Unwrapping Joy and Heartache

It is our second Christmas without Dorothy.  The second year in a row where I find myself alternating between belting out Christmas songs with an almost-convincing bravado and staring at the twinkle lights as they blur through my tear-filled eyes.  A subsequent year of loneliness and "what-ifs" and pretending to the be the last 5…

How to survive the holidays when you are grieving.

How to Survive the Holidays–An Alternative Guide For Grievers

The holidays are here and you are feeling less than jolly.  I get it. You are exhausted from participating in the pageantry of the season while trying to carry your heart that is heavy with grief.  It feels unfair that you have to work so hard at self-care and demonstrating kindness just to keep yourself…

During The Holiday Season, Grief And Gratitude Can Sit At The Same Table

I get it.  Thanksgiving and the holidays bring in the time of year when I'm supposed to focus on what I have and not on what I want.  Instead, of hoping for more I am encouraged to be grateful with what is already present. No, thank you. Everyday I encounter people who believe that I…