It’s Me–I’m The Person With The Dead Baby

I'm the person with the dead baby. It's okay, I'm allowed to be so blunt because it's my truth.  I am the person whose baby died. One day my baby was living and the next day they died.  That is what happened.  It doesn't offend me if you acknowledge this. It offends me when you…

When You Lose A Child, The “New Normal” Will Never Feel Normal

When your child has died, you may be introduced to the concept of the "new normal."  This is the place where you are expected to reside after your loss.  It's meant to be a place where life will go on, but it will go on differently.  I am not against the concept of a new…

Thank You Mr. Ramsey: Why That Cartoon of Barbara and Robin Mattered SO Much

Dear Marshall Ramsey, Thank you.  Those words don't seem nearly big enough right now for the incredible gift you have given our community.  What community is that?  I'm talking about our community of bereaved parents.  Loss moms and dads.  We are a tribe of people being forced to live here on Earth without one or…

40 MORE Things That Can Really Suck After Losing A Baby

When I wrote my first list, 40 Things That Can Really Suck After Losing A Baby, the response was overwhelming.  Moms and dads everywhere could relate to many of the items on the list. I also heard from many of you that the list was incomplete.  I agree.  Unfortunately, the list of things that SUCK after losing…

A Vacation From Grief

I love this picture of us. It was taken on a trip to Washington D.C. two years ago. While on our tour of the White House, my husband, Mike, and I paused to take a silly selfie in one of the mirrors in the East Room. We look so happy. . Looking at this picture,…

40 Things That Can Really Suck After Your Baby Dies

No matter how they died, losing a baby sucks.  It really does. Here's what else has the potential to suck after your baby dies. 1. Baby shower invites. 2. Social media. 3. Playgrounds. 4. Small talk. 5. Commercials for pregnancy tests. 6. Crying in the grocery store. 7. Crying at work. 8. Crying in your…

No one wins at the grief Olympics.

No One Wins At The Grief Olympics

There is no winning with grief.  Yes, there are gains and there are definitely losses, but there is no way to determine who has reached the highest level of grief.  Unlike the Olympic athletes who showcase their strength and prowess, there are no set criteria to determine whose grief has earned them a medal. There are…

Happy Birthday Dorothy: Year 2

Dear Dorothy, Happy Birthday my beautiful girl.  I hope that wherever you spent your day, you felt all the love that was being sent to you.  If you were here right now, I would wrap my arms around you so that you could feel every bit of it. I spent some time today imagining what…